So it has not been the best week...In fact it has been one of the worse weeks of my life. Yesterday was the day we said our final good bye's to my Grandma. It was a very long emotional day. I was exhausted by the end, as I am sure there are many others who were also emotionally drained. The service was beautiful, during the service there were two letters written one by my Aunt that described my Grandmother's life where she was born, where she lived and highlights of her life that made her who she was as a person. My Mom wrote another type of letter, it was a beautiful letter describing how she felt, and how her individual family felt especially Grandma's Great Grandchildren.
Our Children attended the funeral, our 4 year old just had a really hard time understanding everything that had gone on. It wasn't until the car ride home last night that she declared that Grandma was in heaven looking after us. Our 7 year old was his usual sensitive self, he teared up a few times throughout the day but it wasn't until after I put him to bed he came down an hour later in tears with so many questions...I thought to myself how can I answer all these questions, when I myself just don't understand. But I did my very best anyways. Our 12 year old has been grieving in her own way and I think over time she will understand. Right now her main focus is Great Grandma's dog and the need to bring him home and love him.
My husband was amazing throughout all of this, he was my rock. He went on very little sleep then turned around and had to go to work last night,with just a short nap.
I did ok yesterday, I think I had my brave face on for my kids as they needed me and my focus was on them.
Today on the other hand I am very sad and weepy perhaps its because I have nothing to focus on or get ready for, or perhaps its just the realization that this is not just a bad dream but in fact is very real.
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